Hello my friends! It is with great excitement, astonishment and elation that I tell you Jesus has begun His supernatural, physical, healing work in my life!!
It's been 23 years. Twenty-three years of some form of sickness, pain, or depression. I was voted the "Sleepiest" on my Continental Singers choir tour in 1994. I remember it clearly. All I wanted to do was sleep. But I pushed through. Kept playing sports. My Senior year of high school I started sleeping in classes. I couldn't keep pushing. I felt like I had the flu all of the time. What happened? LYME DISEASE. But I didn't know it until 15 years later.
Fast forward to now. This last weekend, I gathered with about 40 other women at the Brave Worship Women's Conference in Franklin, TN. Two lovely ladies and friends of mine, Krissy Nordhoff and Maribeth Dodd, created this event. They've created a podcast called, Brave Worship. Anyway, at the beginning of this event, I was glued to my heating pad. I've been hunched over with chronic pancreatitis since July 2016. (Really, since well before that…but it's been on like Donkey Kong since July.) Everywhere I went at the conference I had to sit down. I have been sapped of strength since July also because well…you know…bouts and bouts of daily diarrhea for months will do that to you. I'm skinny, ya'll. And not the good skinny. Sick skinny. And pale. Gosh. I keep telling my husband I look like death warmed over. (He still thinks I'm cute. Even without boobs and collar bones sticking out.)
Moving on…Saturday night we led the girls through several stations. Each station was set up to zoom in on a specific conversation Jesus had with different women in the Bible. My room? The woman with the issue of blood. She had been bleeding for 12 years. Incurable. Unfixable. All of her life savings down the drain on doctors. This sounds so familiar, doesn't it? But with one last hope she grasped for the hem of Jesus' garment. And she was immediately, and totally -- HEALED.
As I read this story over and over to the groups of women coming into the room, something began to change. The atmosphere changed. This room became the healing room. Actually, the Healer's room. As the girls circled around, I read the story, and then handed each lady worshipper a hem. As we held our hems, I asked if anyone needed healing in the room. Several did. We locked arms and prayed. We went before our good Father and asked for help. We took authority over the demonic. And we got the attention of the Healer. Not only did He show up. He showed off.
The ladies knew I had been sick. They had seen me walking around with my "woobie" heating pad. They had seen me walk hunched over. They knew I had Lyme disease for 20 + years. And then…as we were praying, locking arms, reaching our hearts to heaven - BOOM. Seriously. I'm not exaggerating.
All of the sudden I felt cool all over my abdomen, like the Spirit put holy ice packs on my front and back. It felt like mentholatum had been rubbed all over my organs. Like a pool of cool water rushed and swirled through my organs, my pancreas, my gall bladder, all the way to the back into my kidneys. All the places I have been plagued by pain. No joke. The Lord knew I needed cooling, not heat. It hadn't dawned on me that my pain felt like fire, burning, smoldering in my belly. It's been hot with overwhelming inflammation. And this moment, was like cooling tingles all over my abdomen. And the pain…CEASED.
Shut the front door!
We finished praying and I told the girls what I was feeling. Right in that moment, 5 of us experienced and witnessed this brilliant miracle of generosity and grace from our good, good Father.
This feeling of coolness and "sparkles" in my stomach has continued off and on since Saturday evening. As pain has tried to re-emerge, the cool waters come back flowing over my pain. Over and over this has happened. And every time I feel it, I'm reminded that Holy Spirit is healing me. He has not forgotten about me. He has not abandoned me. He is on the move, moving mountains for me.
If I had to take a guess…I'd say I just got a divine pancreas transplant. Or at least a complete renovation. That's what it feels like. There has been a vice grip around my upper abdomen for months. Years, really. It has felt like a belt cinched about 4 notches too tight. And Saturday night, Holy Spirit unbuckled the belt. He revoked the assignment of the enemy.
GAME. OVER. ENEMY. YOU. LOSE.
Don't you love this? I wish I could embed this feeling I'm experiencing right now as I write this. The cool waters are flowing in my stomach even now. It is pure relief. Like aloe vera on a sunburn. Like my organs are swimming in the pool of Bethesda. It's epic.
Listen, I know God doesn't heal everything on this side of heaven. Believe me. I know this - all too well. I've lost friends in their battles with cancer and other horrific things. And I've been sick for TWENTY THREE years. Hello? That's a long time ya'll. I'm 38. I've got more years on the sick side than the healthy side. You know what I'm sayin'?
But I'm here to tell you, Jesus is real. And there is no other healing, no other wholeness, no other power, no other name that can do what Jesus just did this past weekend.
I know this is getting long, but I need to tell you this. I cannot explain to you how many doctors, methods, oils, treatments I have sought out. I was on over 150 pills a day. All of them have helped some. But none of them could cure me. I truly have been that bleeding woman. There has been nothing the doctors could do. It has literally been unfixable. The top pancreatic specialist at Vanderbilt did everything he could do, including surgery. It did not help.
Sometimes our need is far beyond what we are able to handle ourselves.
I would ask you to join me in rejoicing. It has been a long 23 years. I am still on the mend. The month of November is significant for me. It was the month Jesus whispered to me 18 months ago that He was going to heal me. As November approached, little bits of fear (okay, big bits, sometimes) rose up in me. I kept wanting to believe, but a lot was on the line. Would God really show up? Did I even here Him correctly? What if I was just over-caffeinated?
Do you ever second guess yourself? Do you ever think, "Was that really You Jesus?"
Yes. Yes it was.
Jesus came through. It's not Karma. It's not because I’m a "good" person. It really isn't. Jesus healed me because HE is good, not because I am good. Trust me. I know all my ugly parts.
- If you are in pain - choose joy.
- If you are asking for a miracle - don't give up.
- If you have lost hope - get around a tribe of Jesus-people who can lift you up.
- Get your hopes up. I dare you.
I pray the waters of faith, hope, love, and healing rise up and flow all over you - until you are dancing, frolicking, overflowing, and overwhelmed in the presence of Jesus.
"And blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfillment of what had been spoken to her by the Lord."
"But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its rays. And you will go out and frolic like well-fed calves."
God just did what He said He was going to do. I feel blessed.
PS - Please feel free to SHARE this post with anyone and everyone you think could use the encouragement. Let's watch God redeem all this pain...